Do you love it? Do you loathe it? Do you care?

Discussion in 'General Gardening Discussion' started by LawnAndOrder, Aug 2, 2022.

  1. noisette47

    noisette47 Total Gardener

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    :loll::loll::loll: What a dinky watering can! Once Virginia's roots get going, you're going to have to splash out on a 12l arrosoir ;) When you write 'this heat'...c'est combien exactement? We're between 37°C and 40°C every day until, just possibly, it might rain at the beginning of next week. I re-read Jean de Florette and Manon des Sources every year about this time :biggrin:
    Ha! A Felco man?
     
  2. Sheal

    Sheal Total Gardener

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    Only a few miles north of Loch Ness and about 600 from your good self - not that far really.

    Mme Lab is welcome to try and also claim the bike I don't own. :)
     
  3. LawnAndOrder

    LawnAndOrder Gardener

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    Call me Monsieur Jourdain! I had NO idea: all my life, I’ve been a Felco man! I am walking on air. You make me feel like a man who, for 25 years, thought he had an MG and suddenly realises he has a ReBull.

    Here they are (you can see by the chipped plastic that they are well-worn; many dead heads have fallen under its guillotine!)
    upload_2022-8-9_12-5-10.png

    I’ll give them the “treatment” now that I have done my research and even watched this: A guide to sharpening secateurs

    And call yourself Tiresias (*) for having sufficient second sight to know my tools better than I do! (Although, if truth be told, it’s Mme Lab who uses them mostly; my Sisyphean task is the lawn, remember? I’ve drawn the short straw there: flowers never seem to cause us much trouble, put them in the right soil, in the right place, give them a little food and some water and Bob’s your uncle, but the lawn!... Och!

    Jean de Florette ... Aaah, Pagnol, Raimu, Fernandel ... Les Lettres de Mon Moulin ...

    How hot? you ask. It’s been hotter than you here, check this out (although admittedly only for one day – overall, you win by a large margin ... my goodness! every day, near 40°C! Have some parts of you melted?).

    Here, the news is full of it:

    About 321,000,000 results (0.50 seconds)
    40.3 degrees Celsius
    UK shatters record for its hottest day ever; London fire service declares 'major incident' Britain recorded its hottest-ever day Tuesday, with temperatures hitting a high of 40.3 degrees Celsius (104.5 degrees Fahrenheit) in the east of England, according to provisional data from the Met Office.19 Jul 2022

    Heatwave: UK shatters record for its hottest day ever

    My grandmother (who lived to 96 in St Jeannet – Alpes Maritime - 06) would have been quite chuffed to hear that her “dinky” watering can made it on the prestigious Gardeners Corner Forum; she used it on a daily basis for her indoor plants; it has no “value” but I absolutely treasure it.
    upload_2022-8-9_12-6-46.png
    St Jeannet and its fabulous Baou


    (*) please accept the female connotation; as you know, she was a woman long enough for you not to take offence either at the gender or at Poulenc’s title
     
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      Last edited: Aug 9, 2022
    • LawnAndOrder

      LawnAndOrder Gardener

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      It all sounds fantastic. I’ll have to start psyching myself up and work out how to cross that Loch on a bike; I’ve looked at Google Maps: there are no bridges over it! Is there a tunnel? And is it safe? It’s got one hell of a reputation!

      As you can see, I was traumatized in my tender youth when I was made to think that Scotland was a dour, terrifying, forbidding place, like this:
      upload_2022-8-9_23-55-41.jpeg
      and that Scots looked like this:
      upload_2022-8-9_23-56-29.jpeg
      It wasn’t until I was twelve or thirteen that I discovered the glorious qualities of their drink; I was nearly expelled from school, I had to hang on for dear life:
      upload_2022-8-9_23-57-19.jpeg
       

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      • shiney

        shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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        What's that green stuff? :scratch:
         
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        • NigelJ

          NigelJ Total Gardener

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          Astro Turf?
          And of course there are strong historic links between France and Scotland.
           
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          • LawnAndOrder

            LawnAndOrder Gardener

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            I am in big, BIG trouble now!

            upload_2022-8-10_12-31-58.jpeg

            Just like Alan Titchmarsh, I took my Felco to pieces, cleaned every part, sharpened the blade ... and now I can’t put them back together again, neither can all the King’s horses nor all the King’s men!

            I had asked Mme L. to take a picture of me doing it; she said Do you really want your friends on the Garden Forum to know what a fool you are? I said: Don’t worry, they already know that.

            She then said That was a most important part of my life. I asked: What, more important than me? ... there was no reply.
             
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            • noisette47

              noisette47 Total Gardener

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              They had me foxed the first time I dismantled mine, too No doubt there are any number of Americans on YouTube who can talk you through the reconstruction, but if not, package it all up and send to the Felco service place in Leicester. Can't help more or even post a link as Livebox is en panne. Courage! :-)
               
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              • LawnAndOrder

                LawnAndOrder Gardener

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                Thank you for your positive and encouraging thoughts!

                Things are going extremely well here, stimulated by the sharp spurs of Mrs L’s tongue:

                Blade being sharpened to a razor’s edge (14:17):
                upload_2022-8-10_15-14-53.jpeg

                And now the tomato test (14:47):
                upload_2022-8-10_15-15-30.jpeg

                Then, it’ll be back to the horses and Kings’ men (I am extremely confident!).

                And to think that forty eight hours ago, I had to type into Google: "Felco" meaning?

                Mrs Lab says If you ever get those back together, you'll have to look up how Alan Titchmarsh sharpens edgeing sheers!

                I have made a habit of sharpening Mrs Lab’s kitchen knives ... but am wondering now if that was such a good idea.

                Having said that, I can’t wait for her expression of pleasure when I HAVE put back together that most important part of her life!
                 
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                  Last edited: Aug 10, 2022
                • LawnAndOrder

                  LawnAndOrder Gardener

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                  What shall I tell them?

                  Tell them the truth.

                  People don’t believe the truth, not even from politicians.

                  They will, if you tell them I said it.

                  Alright. Mrs Lab says: That green stuff is grass, and the colour was achieved with diluted seaweed in a knapsack on our backs (*) ... together, of course, with the excellent advice from Liz the Pot. Oh, also tell them that Astro Turf is just about the worst thing for the environment.

                  (*) we "share" the burden; we’ve only got 83 square meters of lawn, mind you; she does 40 square meters and I do 43.
                   
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                  • JWK

                    JWK Gardener Staff Member

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                    I am impressed, if ever I am unable to locate a sharp knife to slice my tomatoes I will dismantle my secateurs, sadly, I am a Wilkco man so doubt anyone would put a video online for fear of being ridiculed. A Hilka man ?
                     
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                    • Upsydaisy

                      Upsydaisy Total Gardener

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                      Forgotten what colour grass is suppose to be around here. :sad:
                       
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                      • NigelJ

                        NigelJ Total Gardener

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                        Pale yellow/straw
                         
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                        • shiney

                          shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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                          Are those the things called spanners? :scratch:
                           
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                          • shiney

                            shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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                            I know how to put a razor edge on cutting implements but know nothing about mantling things once they have been dismantled. So I sharpen garden implements in situ. :noidea:

                            I have managed to survive shaving with a cutthroat razor for well over 60 years. :old: :blue thumb:
                             
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