and the moral is!!!

A pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again and it won again. The local paper read:


PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.


The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race. The next day, the local paper headline read:


BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS.


This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent. The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:


NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.


The bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for �£10. The next day the paper read:


NUN SELLS ASS FOR �£10.


This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild. The next day the headlines read:


NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.


The next day after reading the head lines the bishop had a heart attack and died. a week later he was buried. The moral of the story is.....being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery...and even shorten your life. Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and look after yours and you will live much longer......

 

Nice one OWG many a true word spoken in jest :D :D

 

I got one -

The Vow of Celebracy


The Pope dies and, naturally, goes to heaven where he's met by a reception committee of angels. After a whirlwind tour, The Pope is told that he can enjoy any of the myriad recreations available.

He decides that he wants to read all of the ancient original text of the Holy Scriptures, so he spends the next eon or so learning the languages.

After becoming a linguistic master, he sits down in the library and begins to pour over every version of the Bible, working back from the most recent "Easy Reading" to the original handwritten script.

The angel librarian hears a loud scream, and goes running toward its source only to find the Pope huddled in a chair, shaking and crying.

"The R! They left out the R!"

"What do you mean?" the angel librarian asks.

After collecting his wits, the Pope sobs again, "The word was supposed to be CELEBRATE!"

 

Hilarious, especially the first one!