How to effectively tell someone off?

My latest student at work is, shall we say, sadly lacking in the 'respect for his seniors' department. He routinely criticises the work of those of us who are veterans in our craft, despite the fact he simply has no idea about anything yet. Worse than criticising and mocking our work, he regularly tries to put us down, especially the other younger lads.

The thing is, I'm convinced he doesn't mean it and doesn't even realise he's doing it. Another thing is, I'm probably the most patient and understanding person in our company, so I sometimes don't realise how much he's winding up our colleagues.

Its reached a climax now. I had to stave off the lynch mob today. I've been told I have to have a serious word with him tomorrow otherwise, I'm assured, the other lads are going to take matters into their own hands.

Numerous times, I have words with this lad, and tried to address our concerns in a calm, tactful and respectful way. Each time he behaves for a few days afterwards and then slips back to his old ways. So, tomorrow I will not be taking any pleasure at all in having to give him a proper telling off. Any tips on how I should do this firmly but without making the lad feel like we're all ganging up on him?

I've never had to tell any of my students/juniors off before. I've had to have words, sure enough, but never had to give them a good ticking off.

 

Well I realise its probably a different environment, but in a workshop, if the youngsters get out of line, they usually get sorted by who ever they upset.
Its kind of traditional, and if they complain,....... hard luck mate.

Nobody wants to be Billy Nomates.

 

He's ignored too many chances

 

He is in the wrong working environment for his needs - let him go.

 

I've had to deal with similar, but on a building site where getting above your station has different results. Not sure how to deal with it in an office.

 

Perhaps he needs a direct "mentor"? That way, when his behaviour begins to decline, it will be picked up on sooner and corrected (again, and again, and probably again!).

I do agree, I do not think he is intentionally being a wind-up merchant but is a reflection on how some of his peer group "communicate" between themselves. Of course, now he's in the big wide world and needs to learn the rules of the game.

 

Sadly, I think there is a failing on my part as much as his. I was appointed as his supervisor and mentor, a role I accepted willingly because I've done it many times before and find it really rewarding. Our last student was put under someone else's command and he was being lost, until I intervened and without permission from my gaffer, just took over and turned the situation round.

I failed to realise that everyone else was getting ever increasingly angry and frustrated. It turns out the relative peace was only because they were all trying to completely ignore him.

So tomorrow, I'll have to just tell him. There's no other way round it. The truth is, I think he is just socially inept. So I think after his good telling off, I'll then leave it a few days then suggest a team pint after work. Maybe in the more relaxed environment of the pub, maybe everyone will start to get along again. Either that or there'll be a big blowout and everyone gets it out of their system.

 

Ways and means of dealing with kids and adults for that matter. No two people are the same, we are not programmed the same as robots.
What works for one may not work for another. A stern ticking off may have an opposite effect to what your are trying to achieve and make him worse than he already is. The object of the exercise is to motivate him to be a part of a team.
Tell him how important he is and how you hope he will show leadership qualities in future.
If that doesn't work, sack him.

 

FC, fortunately I don't have the authority or the burden of responsibility to fire him. Even if I did, I agree that would be unfair. It would also be a cop out. He is a person at the end of the day. I've never lost one of my minions yet, and I have no intention of starting now

 

Maybe; have you researched the "Y" generation?

 

Please don't consider him as a failure on your part Clueless. He's going to be the ultimate loser in life as he will come up against this scenario time and time again if he doesn't mend his ways. It's pretty tough getting and holding down a job now and all you can do is make sure that the message gets through.
Wishing your inspiration from reading and judging our replies and I hope it all works out for him and you,
Jenny namaste

 

Kick him in the nuts, tell him to stop peeing people off, tell him it's up to him if he wants the job and if he doesn't show any enthusiasm after a week then get shut. It's not school any more for him, it's his career.