HUMOUR FOR LEXOPHILES

Discussion in 'The Muppet Show' started by jjordie, Jul 19, 2007.

  1. jjordie

    jjordie ex-mod

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    HUMOUR FOR LEXOPHILES


    I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

    Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

    To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

    When fish are in schools they sometimes take de bait.

    The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

    We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.

    The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

    If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.

    A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.

    A will is a dead giveaway.

    In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.

    A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.

    If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

    With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.

    Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A-flat miner.

    You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

    A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine.

    A boiled egg is hard to beat.

    He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

    Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

    When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.

    If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.

    When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

    Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

    Acupuncture: a jab well done.

    ************************************************

    :D
     
  2. elainefiz

    elainefiz Gardener

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  3. Victoria

    Victoria Lover of Exotic Flora

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  4. Kathy3

    Kathy3 Gardener

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    cajary Gardener

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