Suggestions for the Christmas present from hell as far as I’m concerned

Thanks Lori and Happy New Year.
I do have an area which I seldom go into which the “ giver” would see and I wouldn’t often. I also have a couple of fake sort of palms and some Bougainvillea in the attic. (Bougainvillea in Scotland where we were -6oC last night…fat chance). If I don’t manage to flog it to someone at the plant sale, I live in hope! I will smother it in fake plants, put it somewhere I can’t see it and within a year I reckon the abomination will have fallen to bits, it’s such great quality, not! and will be ready for the wood burning stove.

 

Put it in your plant sale with a neatly forged letter from Monty Don or some other garden guru tucked away inside. You can profess utter surprise when a prospective purchaser discovers the letter and then you can respond with " Oh Gosh, yes, I remember now - he gave it to me when I met him years ago - said it had pride of place in his garden at one time ". You may even get a few quid for it. Other than that, your wood burner will appreciate such a gift

 

Love it!

 

I honestly would donate to charity or leave at tip shop. If I don't need it, I don't keep it no matter who's given it to me. I don't expect other people to keep my presents either anymore. When I was younger I used to gift garden plants to my mother-in-law till I understood she wasn't interested at all. Do I feel offended, not at all.

 

Apart from it not being made very well - probably made in china - it looks not that bad.

I've had worse presents myself.

 

Only just seen this , at first I thought the top was flat and it was a potting bench with a compost container underneath, but then I realised that wouldn't have been so bad.
A friend of my wife buys hideous presents too so you are not alone. One was a twirling sculpture "thing" another was a bottle brush plant in a plastic pot. We put that down the bottom of the garden and in spite of complete neglect it survived about 4 years. We told her it suffered in the drought and was in "plant hospital" behind the greenhouse. It finally expired that winter we had wet snow which then froze for over a week. ( The same winter that killed half the Hebe's in the RHS trial at Wisley). Not sure, but I think she finally got the hint and we haven't had anything recently.

 

No such luck Allotment BoyHere’s a better photo of the monstrosity in all its glory. I wonder if it did originally have a bucket and that fell off on it’s journey on a “ slow boat from China”

 

You really want that bucket don't you.

I've got a few old bright red FIRE buckets kicking around, I think it would set it off nicely, pity you're so far away or I could have dropped one off for you.

 

I just could not bond with that thing. I think you should saw the top off now. Put us out of our misery.

 

Remove the uprights. Put road salt into the bottom part and keep in a handy place. Put the lid on the top to keep it dry.

 

Thank you SO much for you kind offer, there is quite a well known saying about what people can do with their less than helpful suggestions but better not repeat it here as I don’t think admin would go a bomb on it.

 

Now that is not such a bad suggestion! Torvil and Dean would be in their element here currently.

 

They a

Always fell over at the end though,didn't they.

 

I had a similar thought about separating the roof, but I would use it to keep open bags of compost (somewhat) dry.

Did you have stormy weather where you are? It could lose its roof in the wind (with a bit of assistance).

 

I don't know if it was mentioned earlier but as soon as someone said "cut the roof off", I thought hedgehog house. A little entrance and some nice bedding material, with a lift off roof. You would have the excuse that you are helping nature and the freedom to tuck it in the bushes out of sight.