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All Discussions About Other Topics: World Events, DIY etc. **Jokes and other funnies to be put in The Muppet Show Forum, please**

  1. The Muppet Show

    ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK !!!! Section For General Banter And Laughs Including Jokes
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    Latest: Yawn Yawn Wakey Wakey 2026 Ladybird4, Jan 6, 2026 at 8:55 PM
  2. Gardeners Corner Question Time

    Members willing to be interrogated by other members can start a thread in here. PLEASE READ THE STICKY ANNOUNCEMENT FIRST.
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    Latest: Ask daitheplant Mike Allen, Jul 19, 2020
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  1. Sheal

    Boy Scouts

    It is really called learning When a child my Mum and Dad bought a house (mortgage) all the money earned went to pay the mortgage nowt left When a job needed doing, it was DIY or nothing, many...
    It is really called learning When a child my Mum and Dad bought a house (mortgage) all the money earned went to pay the mortgage nowt left When a job needed doing, it was DIY or nothing, many failures but got right in the end, The hardest was sweating lead to repair burst lead piping in the...
    It is really called learning When a child my Mum and Dad bought a house (mortgage) all the money earned went to pay the mortgage nowt left When a job needed doing, it was DIY or nothing, many failures but got right in the end, The hardest was...
    It is really called learning When a child my Mum and Dad bought a house (mortgage) all the money earned went to pay the mortgage nowt left When a job needed doing, it was DIY or nothing, many...
    Replies:
    15
    Views:
    929
  2. ARMANDII
    Like x 5

    Disabled work for disabled pay

    the disabled legislation states that 'reasonable adjustment' must be made for disabled people - thats fine by me!shame on that MP!!there is a nursing home near me that had a disabled 'worker'...
    the disabled legislation states that 'reasonable adjustment' must be made for disabled people - thats fine by me!shame on that MP!!there is a nursing home near me that had a disabled 'worker' - they paid her NOTHING! I complained to her social worker and they then started paying her ten quid...
    the disabled legislation states that 'reasonable adjustment' must be made for disabled people - thats fine by me!shame on that MP!!there is a nursing home near me that had a disabled 'worker' - they paid her NOTHING! I complained to her...
    the disabled legislation states that 'reasonable adjustment' must be made for disabled people - thats fine by me!shame on that MP!!there is a nursing home near me that had a disabled 'worker'...
    Replies:
    10
    Views:
    772
  3. JWK

    Olympic Tickets - did you get any?

    Only 2 million people applied for tickets, in the first round there were 5.5 million tickets available. Only 700,000 people actually got tickets, on average they would get 7 or 8 tickets each!...
    Only 2 million people applied for tickets, in the first round there were 5.5 million tickets available. Only 700,000 people actually got tickets, on average they would get 7 or 8 tickets each!The vast majority of us (1.3 million) got nothing because we only applied for one or two tickets. Now...
    Only 2 million people applied for tickets, in the first round there were 5.5 million tickets available. Only 700,000 people actually got tickets, on average they would get 7 or 8 tickets each!The vast majority of us (1.3 million) got nothing...
    Only 2 million people applied for tickets, in the first round there were 5.5 million tickets available. Only 700,000 people actually got tickets, on average they would get 7 or 8 tickets each!...
    Replies:
    30
    Views:
    3,470
  4. joolz68

    the chameleons,80s band

    I'm with you on both counts, love Hurts:WINK1:[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQ1v1pMdIoQ[/url]
    I'm with you on both counts, love Hurts:WINK1:[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQ1v1pMdIoQ[/url]
    I'm with you on both counts, love Hurts:WINK1:[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQ1v1pMdIoQ[/url]
    I'm with you on both counts, love Hurts:WINK1:[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQ1v1pMdIoQ[/url]
    Replies:
    6
    Views:
    758
  5. Sheal

    Insomniacs!

    I thought there must have been a reason! :loll: It hasn't put us off of Wales - it's just a good talking point :heehee:. At present our holidays in Britain are restricted as we are still doing our globe...
    I thought there must have been a reason! :loll: It hasn't put us off of Wales - it's just a good talking point :heehee:. At present our holidays in Britain are restricted as we are still doing our globe trotting to out of the way places :dbgrtmb: - but my poor old bones are finding it more difficult each year :).
    I thought there must have been a reason! :loll: It hasn't put us off of Wales - it's just a good talking point :heehee:. At present our holidays in Britain are restricted as we are still doing our globe trotting to out of the way places :dbgrtmb: - but my poor old...
    I thought there must have been a reason! :loll: It hasn't put us off of Wales - it's just a good talking point :heehee:. At present our holidays in Britain are restricted as we are still doing our globe...
    Replies:
    53
    Views:
    3,697
  6. roders

    Greetings from Crete.

    Glad to hear you are having a great time over in Crete Roders.:thumbsup:I did a bit of Googling and it looks a beautiful island but I would find it a tad too hot there with my fair skin:DWhat part of the...
    Glad to hear you are having a great time over in Crete Roders.:thumbsup:I did a bit of Googling and it looks a beautiful island but I would find it a tad too hot there with my fair skin:DWhat part of the island are you staying in?:) Looking forward to your return and hope you enjoy the rest of your time...
    Glad to hear you are having a great time over in Crete Roders.:thumbsup:I did a bit of Googling and it looks a beautiful island but I would find it a tad too hot there with my fair skin:DWhat part of the island are you staying in?:) Looking forward to your...
    Glad to hear you are having a great time over in Crete Roders.:thumbsup:I did a bit of Googling and it looks a beautiful island but I would find it a tad too hot there with my fair skin:DWhat part of the...
    Replies:
    11
    Views:
    556
  7. Sheal

    The deep south west.....

    Sheal, i'd love to say hello so if you'd like to count me in to your plan that would be great :) Will PM you later !
    Sheal, i'd love to say hello so if you'd like to count me in to your plan that would be great :) Will PM you later !
    Sheal, i'd love to say hello so if you'd like to count me in to your plan that would be great :) Will PM you later !
    Sheal, i'd love to say hello so if you'd like to count me in to your plan that would be great :) Will PM you later !
    Replies:
    2
    Views:
    607
  8. Aesculus

    Dalai Lama Awkward TV Host Interview Joke...

    The Buddhist way/belief is to be calm and mindful of everything (and everyone) .... to be 'at one, with everything' ........... so the presenter's trying to imply that that the pizza is 'one...
    The Buddhist way/belief is to be calm and mindful of everything (and everyone) .... to be 'at one, with everything' ........... so the presenter's trying to imply that that the pizza is 'one with everything'.
    The Buddhist way/belief is to be calm and mindful of everything (and everyone) .... to be 'at one, with everything' ........... so the presenter's trying to imply that that the pizza is 'one with everything'.
    The Buddhist way/belief is to be calm and mindful of everything (and everyone) .... to be 'at one, with everything' ........... so the presenter's trying to imply that that the pizza is 'one...
    Replies:
    4
    Views:
    1,097
  9. loopy lou
    Like x 4

    Happy Solstice

    A belated Happy Solstice! We quite fancy the idea of joining the festivities at stone henge one day. Not least because it is my daughters birthday. It was her due date and indeed she arrived just...
    A belated Happy Solstice! We quite fancy the idea of joining the festivities at stone henge one day. Not least because it is my daughters birthday. It was her due date and indeed she arrived just as the sun rose on the longest day. She was 4 yesterday and we settled for the museum and a HUGE...
    A belated Happy Solstice! We quite fancy the idea of joining the festivities at stone henge one day. Not least because it is my daughters birthday. It was her due date and indeed she arrived just as the sun rose on the longest day. She was 4...
    A belated Happy Solstice! We quite fancy the idea of joining the festivities at stone henge one day. Not least because it is my daughters birthday. It was her due date and indeed she arrived just...
    Replies:
    14
    Views:
    1,086
  10. jenny22

    ice cream

    I certainly dont get much sleep KL, what with watching out for chicken thieves, little nameless men/women and this gale creature, stood under the cherry trees for hours yesterday catching the...
    I certainly dont get much sleep KL, what with watching out for chicken thieves, little nameless men/women and this gale creature, stood under the cherry trees for hours yesterday catching the cherries as 'it' flung them off at me jenn
    I certainly dont get much sleep KL, what with watching out for chicken thieves, little nameless men/women and this gale creature, stood under the cherry trees for hours yesterday catching the cherries as 'it' flung them off at me jenn
    I certainly dont get much sleep KL, what with watching out for chicken thieves, little nameless men/women and this gale creature, stood under the cherry trees for hours yesterday catching the...
    Replies:
    10
    Views:
    719
  11. Sheal

    Happy Ruby Wedding Aniversary Jack

    congrats to you both jack xx 40yrs blimey:) :hapfeet: heres to your next 40yrs aswell:cheers: xx
    congrats to you both jack xx 40yrs blimey:) :hapfeet: heres to your next 40yrs aswell:cheers: xx
    congrats to you both jack xx 40yrs blimey:) :hapfeet: heres to your next 40yrs aswell:cheers: xx
    congrats to you both jack xx 40yrs blimey:) :hapfeet: heres to your next 40yrs aswell:cheers: xx
    Replies:
    4
    Views:
    610
  12. miraflores

    Ice Age

    definitely cooooool .......
    definitely cooooool .......
    definitely cooooool .......
    definitely cooooool .......
    Replies:
    21
    Views:
    1,765
  13. Phil A

    Anyone deliver leaflets ?

    Shiney strikes again.:heehee::loll:
    Shiney strikes again.:heehee::loll:
    Shiney strikes again.:heehee::loll:
    Shiney strikes again.:heehee::loll:
    Replies:
    21
    Views:
    1,957
  14. JWK

    Father's Day Gardening gifts

    Can you be that sure? :heehee::WINK1:
    Can you be that sure? :heehee::WINK1:
    Can you be that sure? :heehee::WINK1:
    Can you be that sure? :heehee::WINK1:
    Replies:
    15
    Views:
    1,471
  15. Sheal

    Silver Surfers!

    My very good friend and neighbour bought himself a laptop and a digital camera. He's 82 and getting on fine with them.
    My very good friend and neighbour bought himself a laptop and a digital camera. He's 82 and getting on fine with them.
    My very good friend and neighbour bought himself a laptop and a digital camera. He's 82 and getting on fine with them.
    My very good friend and neighbour bought himself a laptop and a digital camera. He's 82 and getting on fine with them.
    Replies:
    9
    Views:
    1,009
  16. Fidgetsmum

    Silly question about a 'Blackberry'®

    Hi Pru - yep, it's linked to both my email accounts. Typical innit - I finally bow to pressure from the younger generation, get myself a load of technology (that to be honest, I neither really...
    Hi Pru - yep, it's linked to both my email accounts. Typical innit - I finally bow to pressure from the younger generation, get myself a load of technology (that to be honest, I neither really wanted nor needed) and no-one wants to talk to me. :cry3::cry3: I'm going now. I'm going to email myself, just...
    Hi Pru - yep, it's linked to both my email accounts. Typical innit - I finally bow to pressure from the younger generation, get myself a load of technology (that to be honest, I neither really wanted nor needed) and no-one wants to talk to me. :cry3::cry3:...
    Hi Pru - yep, it's linked to both my email accounts. Typical innit - I finally bow to pressure from the younger generation, get myself a load of technology (that to be honest, I neither really...
    Replies:
    6
    Views:
    686
  17. Val..

    Done it again!!!

    Most veg that you'd boil responds very well to steaming instead. Then there's nothing to drain, so no spills.If you want to cook a veg that takes a while, and one that is much quicker (peas and...
    Most veg that you'd boil responds very well to steaming instead. Then there's nothing to drain, so no spills.If you want to cook a veg that takes a while, and one that is much quicker (peas and carrots say), then the one that takes longest gets a head start, then the quick one gets added. No...
    Most veg that you'd boil responds very well to steaming instead. Then there's nothing to drain, so no spills.If you want to cook a veg that takes a while, and one that is much quicker (peas and carrots say), then the one that takes longest gets...
    Most veg that you'd boil responds very well to steaming instead. Then there's nothing to drain, so no spills.If you want to cook a veg that takes a while, and one that is much quicker (peas and...
    Replies:
    10
    Views:
    743
  18. kyleleonard

    Jeff Buckley

    I'm even further back Sheal - like others of my generation the Elvis Presley phenomenon took over and all that followed........... I still enjoy some of the modern bands and watched Coldplay at...
    I'm even further back Sheal - like others of my generation the Elvis Presley phenomenon took over and all that followed........... I still enjoy some of the modern bands and watched Coldplay at Glastonbury last night (on the TV) - very good.
    I'm even further back Sheal - like others of my generation the Elvis Presley phenomenon took over and all that followed........... I still enjoy some of the modern bands and watched Coldplay at Glastonbury last night (on the TV) - very good.
    I'm even further back Sheal - like others of my generation the Elvis Presley phenomenon took over and all that followed........... I still enjoy some of the modern bands and watched Coldplay at...
    Replies:
    16
    Views:
    1,132
  19. shiney
    Like x 6

    Waitrose - Don't Believe Them!!

    Dave !!!
    Dave !!!
    Dave !!!
    Dave !!!
    Replies:
    41
    Views:
    3,028
  20. Melinda
    Like x 3

    The ice cream van is here- what are you having?

    Melinda, as if I ever would.:DOH::yess:
    Melinda, as if I ever would.:DOH::yess:
    Melinda, as if I ever would.:DOH::yess:
    Melinda, as if I ever would.:DOH::yess:
    Replies:
    43
    Views:
    5,417

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