Botany with Nigel Molesworth

I discovered the Molesworth books (Geoffrey Willans and Ronald Searle) when I was roughly the same age as the fictional Nigel. He was the only way to make double maths followed by triple games bearable. For those of you who haven't met Nigel, he's a fifties schoolboy with terrible spelling but an acute eye for the absurdities of the adult world. Here is Miss Pringle's nature walk:-

Harra for the botany walk!

Now boys get into croc. Tinies in front seniors at the rear. Off for the woods and keep your eyes skinned. Ha-ha - what do we see at once but a little robin! There is no need to burst into tears fotherington-tomas swete tho he be. Nor to buzz a brick at it, Molesworth 2.

Pause at the zebra look left look right. Strate into the vicar's bicycle. That's all right we were none of us hurt and i canot believe that the vicar really said that, Grabber.

Ho for the woods agane!


Tread softly tippy toes. There is a bunny sprinting to its warren. And there is a rook - one of the most fasscinating of the crow family. Keep that leaf for your pressings book, plunkett 2. You can see what, molesworth? A man-eating tiger? It hav a horible face with beedy eyes and weedy whiskers? i am sure you are mistaken. Ah, it was only the matron. Good afternoon, mato!

Now scater for specimens and when i blo the whistle scamper back to the fairy ring.

Peep!

Now. Wot hav we?

A dead bird, peason? I don't think that would find its place in the nature museum it is so very dead .... A fern frond, fotherington-tomas. I shall kepe it and wear it on my hat.