The Muppet Show

Yes, it's again that magical time of the year when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us. Here is the glorious Winners:1. When his 38 - caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California , would-be robber James...

A flat chested lady went to see Dr smith about enlarging her tiny breasts. Dr Smith gave her the following advise " Every day after your shower rub your chest and say " Scooby doobie doobies I want bigger bobbies " She did this faithfully for several months and it worked She grew terrific D...

Feller went to a pet shop and bought a budgie. He went back a week later and said to the shop owner, "This budgie hasn't said a word since I've had it" The owner said, "Has it got a mirror?" "No" Replied the feller. "Well, said the owner, buy a mirror and then it'll talk" So the feller bought a...

:D

very funny :D :D

A young Geordie lad moved to London and went to Harrods looking for a job. The manager asked "Do you have any sales experience?" The young man answered "Eye, hods, I wer a canny salesman back in Newcastle." The manager liked the Geordie so he gave him the job. His first day on the job was...

:D :D ..Brilliant..Love it!

:D MIke, why do so many of your jokes remind me of my Ex. Stop it. :D

After having their 11th child, a Liverpool couple decided that was enough, as the social wouldn't buy them a bigger bed and they weren't strong enough to nick one. The husband went to his doctor and told him that he and his wife didn't want to have any more children. The doctor told him there...

:D :D

I know that one Gogs, but I enjoyed reading it again.

And one you could even tell to little kids. I don't mind the occasional rude joke, but it is nice sometimes to hear ones you could share with anyone....why even my mother would find this one funny.

nice one :D

:D :D :D :D I used to be a copper :D

Sorry everyoneKandy has pointed out that I forgot to put the answers hereSo here they are.GARDENING QUIZ - ANSWERS1. What is a Bombus hortorum? a) a bat, b) a ladybird, c) a bumble bee Answer - c2. Mint belongs to which family? a) Lamiaceae, b) Roseaceae c)...

I'm going to guard my puppy dog very carefully. :D

Kool Shiney :D

Talking of NASA reminds me that many many years ago Mrs shiney had to phone the IMF on a private line at their head office. She thought nothing of it when an American voice answered (which is what she expected) but got a bit disturbed when she was being asked a lot of questions about who she...

Marks for the first part of THE TWENTIETH CENTURY QUIZThe highest scorers were walnut and Kandy both with 82 followed by kryssy with 71 :DThat is a good result.Everyone did well but I shall let the rest work out their own scores.