The Muppet Show

Well thats just attention seeking.

After both suffering from depression for a while, me and the wife were going to commit suicide yesterday.But strangely enough….once she killed herself I started to feel a lot better.So I thought…Sod it….soldier on.

I woke up this morning at 8 and knew something was wrong. I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing!I panicked. I didn’t know what to do. :oThen I remembered Wetherspoons serve breakfast until 11.30.

i missed that post but i still think some one is stalking my hubby

Better than finding a Panda - and cheaper to run.

Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their local golf course when a guy carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn't turn up." "Sure," they said, "You're welcome." So they started playing and enjoyed the game and the company...

Do any of you drive a modified car? Would you like to improve its appearance even more with a body lowering kit? Got just the thing for you. Lowering Kit [LOW34] - $19.99 : KaleCoAuto, Hard to find automotive items! Very cheap.

I thought he was the head of BA? (Willie Walsh)

Think i've told this one before, but here seems an apropriate place to put it again. I was driving from Axminster to Chard, a 60mph road but quite bendy, the only good place to overtake is a straight steep hill halfway along. The woman in front was doing between 10 & 30 mph, after a while it...

Sorry, I didn't notice. I never read the popout balloons on video clips.

Good find Harry. The winner will take some beating.

Thanks Redstar. I have just informed the wife,who has just put out her 15th cigarette of the day,after watching 888300of Television. She is away for a shot on her Nordic Walker .she is very keep fit minded :WINK1::WINK1:.

Teacher Right Children I Want You All to go Home and Wright A Story!!! BUT Rember The Story Must Have A Moral!!!! Little Mary Puts Her Hand up Miss Miss Can I Tell My Story Miss Go On Then Marry lets Hear IT BUT REMBER IT MUST HAVE A MORAL!!!!! Last Night Miss I Went Shopping For Grandma I...

Someone has too, too, much time on their hands.

Groan, groan!!! That's one up on you Jack!

lmfao

Dont watch if swearing upsets please,but made me laugh to be honest Tale of Three Shitties: Lessons I've Learned From Turkey Manure - YouTube

The voice of reason in an insane world Thank you Esther:pickflower:

Them? Who's them? The ones I work with are as British as anyone else and educated and erudite people to boot.

I have been in many places, but I've never been in Cahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone.I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there. I...