I Don't Believe It!

I replaced another four fence panels this afternoon, one I had to cut down to a couple of feet wide, as it was to replace the "short panel" at the end of the run down one side of the garden.
To install them I got a neighbour to help, blithely saying it'd only take a few minutes, using my "patent fence prop method." A long pole connected to the cente of the top rail of the panel by two strong metal eyes. Easy enough to raise the panel on this and drop it in the slots.

"Simples"

My neighbour was well impressed until we came to the last panel, which wouldn't fit. So for a minute it was swinging in the air like the sail on a Viking longship, as we attempted to force it in. But no way! We put it down had a beer and then I measured the gap between the concrete posts.
Naffin' 71 inches!

So I had to prise off the end rails and cut it down with a jig saw and re-fix the rails.

I can only conclude that when the fencing firm errected the original fence twenty years ago, they must have had one "short" panel, as they use each one to set out the position of the next post in the line.

Still, all done and dusted now.

 

Doh! My husband's formula for working out how long a job will take is 'oet + bf2 - (bgl ÷ tt) = AT' (original estimated time, plus bu**eration factor squared, minus bit of good luck divided by thinking time, equals Actual Time). Never fails!

And talking of 'who the 'ell put this in' - in our first house, someone had taken out the both door and frame leading to the kitchen (no, we've no idea why either), but it just left a wall with a hole in it and, on measuring the width, it was discovered that some plastering must have been done since the aperture was only 2' 2", put in a frame and the door would have been little more than a plank of wood with hinges. 'Sir' therefore decided to merely 'box' in the top, make an archway and replace the missing coving by slotting a new piece in, except ... the bits of coving on either side of the 'ole were of different sizes. In the end, by judicious use of a piece of Bockingford watercolour card we finally had a new piece of 'coving'. I just hope when the new owners came to decorate, they didn't sand that bit with too much enthusiasm!

 

Reminds me, we were discussing the replacement of an ordinary door to a concertina one. Our youngest son, present at the time, but not party to the conversation, put in his two penn'oth.

"I wouldn't have one of those doors, prospective buyers don't like them."

"But we're not thinking of selling."

"Yes, but one day, I might!"

In the end it was our decision not to change the door....I think!

As for jobs, I try to schedule them on a day "when she hasn't got to go anywhere." I hate working to deadlines, but you can be sure that sometimes she'll find there will be a need for me to stop work, get changed and go out in the car somewhere.
Then there's the other situation, I can be down at the end of the garden involved in something or other and I'll hear her call from the French windows that one of her friends has arrived, so it's always, "We need two cappuccinos!"

Doh!

 

Would she like driving lessons for Christmas mayhap?

 

Unfortunately her MS means any driving would be an impossibility. This however doesn't prevent her from giving me driving advice (only as an aside to her constant chatter, she's like an unemployed tour guide) and criticising other drivers.

I'm quite a laid back driver, seen it all. But she does fall for it every time.

She'll see someone do something a bit silly on the road, I never say anything, just take the appropriate action.

But she'll say "Did you see that!?"

I'll quietly reply, "Yes, it was a woman." Regardles of the sex of the driver.

 

My Husband can be zooming along quite happily ,while I am eyeing the left/right turn we have to make, :skp:
if I don`t say we need to turn ,I should have reminded him,:dh:
if I do I am turning into "Mrs Bucket" (keeping up appearances).

 

Necessity is the Mother of Invention..as they say!