How to feel good

By following simple advice heard on a TV show, you too can find inner peace. They proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and have never finished."
So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished, and before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of chardonnay, a bottle of Bailey's Irish Cream, a bottle of Vodka, a package of crisps, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some crackers and a box of chocolates. You have no idea how freaking good I feel. Please pass this on to those whom you think might be in need of inner peace.

 

:D :D :D