Am I morally wrong ?

Discussion in 'General Gardening Discussion' started by PaulB3, Dec 1, 2018.

  1. Kandy

    Kandy Will be glad to see the sun again soon.....

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    When my mum passed away suddenly her garden was full to the brim with summer flowering plants and my elder brother being the head of the family said that he wanted mums garden to be left as it was so I thought that all the family was in agreement with this.The house,after being cleared was locked up and put into the hands of the estate agents to sell.It wasn’t until a couple of years later I was informed by a third party that my older siblings and their wives/husbands had knocked on the neighbours front door armed with gardening equipment and asked if they could climb over the low garden wall that separated the two gardens and spent time stripping out all the plants (geraniums,begonias,roses and much more) from out of the raised beds and took the whole lot home with them to be divided between them all.I was so shocked and upset by what they had done and it caused bad feelings for many years.I don’t think any of the plants survived that long anyway as my older siblings were too busy working and raising their kids to worry about a few flowers:sad:

    I had the last laugh as a few years before mum dies she dug up a winter jasmine cutting that had rooted itself into the ground and this was from an original plant that was bought and planted to celebrate my birth.(A shrub,tree,or rose was bought and planted each time another child was born)and this plant has been taken from where we used to live to our current house plus she also gave me a rooted cutting of Lysmachia Punctata(can’t rememer how to spell this plant) and some perennial sweet pea seeds that flower every year and are still going strong :biggrin:

    It is wrong to take the plants after you have already been paid for them and really it is up to the new tennants to decide whether they want to keep them or not.You could always drop a note through their letterbox with your contact details asking the question about having some of the plants,they will either say yes or no and at least you will know where you stand :smile:
     
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      Last edited: Dec 4, 2018
    • Clare G

      Clare G Super Gardener

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      @Kandy I was so sorry to read your account of what happened to your mother's garden. What a stupid, inconsiderate thing your siblings did. People can act strangely when they are grieving, of course - but that was well out of order. I am happy that you've got those other plants from her to cherish, though. Similarly I have a honeysuckle and a couple of succulents that started out as cuttings from my mother's garden. A lovely permanent reminder of her.
       
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      • Kandy

        Kandy Will be glad to see the sun again soon.....

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        3B69A556-4B63-4169-BC3F-472979923CB7.jpeg @Clare G I sometimes think that a death in the family can bring out the worst in people at times and all these years later they are still all moaning about who took what from the house when she died and the stupid thing is that the will stipulated that we were all allowed to choose one main item and then the rest had to be disposed of within one month of her passing so there wasn’t a lot of time to clear the house,get the funeral arrangement sorted out and get the house on the market as the company who mum remortgaged the house to (long story:sad:) wanted their money:sad:

        This is the Jasmine I was talking about,not the original one that mum gave me but a offshoot that we dug up that had rooted at the bungalow where we used to live and as have another plant elsewhere in the garden so it lives on and on.I have cut back the Lysimachia and the sweet pea so they will lie dormant until the spring so all in all I must be the only one that has plants from mums garden:snorky:

        We also have some house leeks that we bought Mr Kandys mum for Mothers day one year but not being a gardener they languished in the clay pot on its side for years in her garden so when we had the task of clearing my late father in-laws house I asked if I could take the pot of half dead plant material and the answer from my sister in law was yes so I brought it home,separated what was left and gently put them into my gravel bed where they are gradually building up the little rosettes and making more plants:yes:

        PS sorry to hijack this thread,was just saying that this problem can happen to anyone:sad:
         
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          Last edited: Dec 4, 2018
        • Verdun

          Verdun Passionate gardener

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          Nice one Kandy.....you had the best of the deal :)
          I have a few plants of sentimental value....they add emotion to the garden:)
           
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          • clanless

            clanless Super Gardener

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            Well, I know someone who will visit a garden and take cuttings. I've also heard that the same person has taken cuttings from plants in garden centres.......naughty.......
             
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            • shiney

              shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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              We often come away from gardens with cuttings but never without asking the owner first. :blue thumb: Never do that in a garden centre :nonofinger:.
               
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              • Mike Allen

                Mike Allen Super Gardener

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                I remember one year at the RHS Westminster halls. An exhibition was laid on by the BFS (British Fuchsia Society).
                Standing, chatting with some of the Greats of the fuchsia world, and we couldn't belive our eyes. This chap, carrier bag in hand was snipping off cuttings from each plant, totally ignoring the looks that we and members of the public were giving him. Eventually he made his exit.
                 
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                • shiney

                  shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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                  We were at a flower and horticultural show once and I saw someone doing that. So I yelled out loud "Have you got permission to do that?" He ran, and got chased off the showground.
                   
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                  • Kandy

                    Kandy Will be glad to see the sun again soon.....

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                    F232690A-962F-40E5-8300-DE7594A192B8.jpeg944C3D6D-5CA3-4693-AFEB-AB95E5A0D89D.jpeg Forgive me father because I sinned.Yesterday when I went to post a Xmas card at my friends house in the next street.A house two doors down from her is empty of furniture and humans and as I walked past noticed a couple of very soggy Agapanthus seed heads drooping down to the pavement outside of the front garden.Without thinking I collected them up and wrapped them up in a tissue and took them home where I separated them from the soggy seed head and dried them off ready for sowing.:smile:

                    Thinking about it now was I wrong to collect them or should I have left them to get trodden into the tarmac?:sad:
                     
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                      Last edited: Dec 6, 2018
                    • clanless

                      clanless Super Gardener

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                      Sounds like a scene from the Benny Hill Show....:smile:
                       
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                      • shiney

                        shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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                        You saved their lives and are a hero. :love30:
                         
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                        • Snorky85

                          Snorky85 Total Gardener

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                          Reading this thread has given me a chuckle. Reminded me of the summer at a flower show. I wanted a red coloured sedum plant....went back to the stall just before leaving and they had sold out....how annoying! On my way back to the car I found a bit of red sedum that had been snapped off a plant and trodden on....so I saved it too and took it home...now I've got some growing well ready for next year :D
                           
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                            Last edited: Jan 2, 2019
                          • Verdun

                            Verdun Passionate gardener

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                            Dearie dearie me! I is shocked by the brazen declarations of theft above!!!! :gaah:
                             
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                            • Ned

                              Ned Evaporated

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                              :snorky:.... No you is not :whistle:
                               
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                              • Amy Willshire

                                Amy Willshire Gardener

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                                My grandfather always used to raid peoples gardens for cuttings. My mum remembers family holidays when he would spot something in a garden and help himself to leaves and stalks and berries. It was shocking and used to embarrass the other family members, but his garden was beautiful.
                                When he died, my gran bought an expensive flowering plant to put in the front garden and buried his ashes around it. The plant died. My gran dug it up and my mum took it back to the garden centre where the shop assistant said "what is this grey powder on the roots?".
                                My mum replied "it's my dad".
                                The shop assistant said "tell him not to do it again" and exchanged the plant for a new one.
                                Mum and gran then spread the ashes across the wider garden and the replacement flowering plant thrived until my gran moved to sheltered accommodation.
                                 
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