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Goliath Undefeated ...

Discussion in 'General Gardening Discussion' started by LawnAndOrder, May 17, 2022.

  1. LawnAndOrder

    LawnAndOrder Gardener

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    Trying to get rid of an unbelievably stubborn cluster of well-established bamboo.

    Having been advised first to kill the plant, we used a product called Roundup; perhaps that was the wrong thing to do because, in dying, the root ball vindictively turned into a rock which even Sisyphus would be stumped by.

    Neither bazookas, dynamite, nor Exocets being available to the general public, I am at a loss as to how to terminate the passive enemy.

    The attached illustrates my current strategy but the problem is that when the pickaxe has penetrated the monster’s skin (with the effectiveness of a mosquito stinging an elephant), it then takes a Hercules to extract it again and an Atlas once more to raise it in the air for a renewed attack … it feels as if this straw-like leviathan will break my back before any kind of headway is achieved here …

    Bamboo Forest - 2.jpgBamboo Forest - 3 (2).jpg
    Any ideas?
     
  2. pete

    pete Growing a bit of this and a bit of that....

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    Leave it to rot.:smile:
     
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    • NigelJ

      NigelJ Total Gardener

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      I dug one out about 5 years ago after it had flowered the previous year. Used a pick and old secateurs, I found the mattocky end was more effective than the pointy end. Took a few sunny evenings as it had the texture of an old springy sofa, just worked across it from an edge.
      I dumped somewhere I taken soil from and then tipped soil back on top and covered with old dumpy bag. Good news it didn't regrow, bad news it still hasn't rotted much.
      The stumps are painful to stand on in anything less than good boots.
       
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      • LawnAndOrder

        LawnAndOrder Gardener

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        I am afraid I'll do that before IT does ... We poisoned it well over a year ago and, as I wrote, rather than rot or soften, it turned into the Tarpeian rock!
        Mine has the texture of the Eiger ... which is probably easier to climb than this f...iendish fellow!
        But thank you for the rest of your good news!
         
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        • LawnAndOrder

          LawnAndOrder Gardener

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          Yes! Once the integrity is damaged it becomes a possibility ... At first, I thought it might take me 25 years, but now I think I may be able to report completion in less than 12.
           
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          • NigelJ

            NigelJ Total Gardener

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            Everybody needs a hobby.
             
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            • shiney

              shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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              I'll ask my friend whether he can help out. :dbgrtmb:

              [​IMG]
               
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              • Sheal

                Sheal Total Gardener

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                I think you'll need a mini digger. That's what was used to remove mine.
                 
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                • flounder

                  flounder Gardener

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                  Dig a hole/trench in front of the bamboo, remove soil towards said bamboo, as you expose roots, cut with a saw, shouldn't take any longer than three months.
                  I curled my toes when I saw the swing of the mattock with wearing soft bootys!!:yikes:
                   
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                  • CarolineL

                    CarolineL Total Gardener

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                    How about trying to drill holes and filling with epsom salts? It apparently helps tree stumps to rot down quicker. It might help with this which otherwise looks like a Promethean punishment...
                     
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                    • LawnAndOrder

                      LawnAndOrder Gardener

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                      Now, there's an idea ... FIRE!!!! ... Reduce the thing to ashes ... and watch out for the Phoenix!

                      However, the MOD informs me that flame-throwers are not available for non-military personnel ... even though we pay for them! … I do have a blowtorch to scorch crème brulée, though.
                       
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                        Last edited: May 19, 2022
                      • LawnAndOrder

                        LawnAndOrder Gardener

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                        Ingenious, and will try either with saw or lopper, thank you.
                         
                      • shiney

                        shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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                      • Loofah

                        Loofah Well used member Staff Member

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                        Is this turning into a Greek tragedy?!
                         
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                        • LawnAndOrder

                          LawnAndOrder Gardener

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                          It hasn't but may yet do so if I don’t follow Flounder’s advice (which I will).

                          … What a multi-headed Hydra! Live shoots three metres away from a stone-dead stump; all gardeners be warned: NEVER plant that thing unless in a reinforced concrete pot … I will come to the end of it but, meanwhile, Greek tragedy or not, the quote (I may be misquoting) comes to mind: “Having done what men could, they suffered what men must …!

                           
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