Newspaper ads

[size=medium]These are classified ads, which were, supposedly, placed in a U.K. newspaper:[/size][size=medium][/size]

[size=medium]FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.[/size]

[size=medium]8 years old.[/size]

[size=medium]Hateful little illegitimate child.[/size]

[size=medium]Bites![/size][size=medium][/size]

[size=medium]FREE PUPPIES.[/size]

[size=medium]1/2 Cocker Spaniel,[/size][size=medium]1/2 sneaky neighbour's dog.[/size][size=medium][/size]

[size=medium]FREE PUPPIES.[/size]

[size=medium]Mother is a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd.[/size]

[size=medium]Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.[/size][size=medium][/size]

[size=medium]COWS, CALVES: [/size]

[size=medium]NEVER BRED.[/size]

[size=medium]Also 1 gay bull for sale.[/size][size=medium][/size]

[size=medium]JOINING NUDIST COLONY![/size]

[size=medium]Must sell washer and dryer £100.[/size][size=medium][/size]

[size=medium]WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE .[/size]

[size=medium]Worn once by mistake.[/size]

[size=medium]Call Stephanie.[/size][size=medium][/size]



[size=medium]**** And the WINNER is... ****[/size][size=medium][/size]

[size=medium]FOR SALE BY OWNER.[/size]

[size=medium]Complete set of Encyclopaedia Britannica, 45 volumes.[/size]

[size=medium]Excellent condition, £200 or best offer.[/size]

[size=medium]No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.[/size]



[size=medium] [/size][size=medium]STATEMENT OF THE CENTURY[/size]

[size=medium]Thought from the Greatest Living Scottish Thinker.[/size][size=medium]Billy Connolly -[/size]

[size=medium]"If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, how come they can't have a headache and sex at the same time?"[/size][size=medium][/size][size=medium][/size]

 

I like it, Shiney.